Since I last wrote a lot has happened...First, I have opted to stay off the scale. I can honestly tell you, I have no idea how much I weigh and I don't want to know. I am very tired of bowing down to a number. No more.
Second, I went out and purchased clothes that I really like and bought them in my size. It was quite an adventure. I really thoroughly enjoyed myself. I tried on the clothes in the dressing room and even though they were a size bigger the walls didn't come crashing down, life didn't stop, and, I have to say, I looked good in them. I don't know if there was a two way mirror or any form of security watching me but if there was, they saw me lift my hands and praise and thank God. When I took my treasures to check out, the cashier was a very friendly older lady. I told her, "You have no idea what a major thing this is." I began to share with her my story of gaining weight while laid up and buying a bigger size and how all is still well with the world. She completely understood...as did the woman behind me. Before I knew it, we were all talking and laughing. God provided angels.
Finally, I still am going to physical therapy for my knee. Part of the workout is riding a bike for 8 minutes. On the little screen that keeps the time is also a number that you can set to show RPMs or calories burned....it's always on Calories burned when I get on it so I immediately turn it to RPMs. I don't want to feed the beast.
I feel like God has opened the door of the prison and every one of these steps I've taken are steps out the door. God doesn't want us bowing to the demands of this world. He wants us bowing only to Him and focusing on the things of Him and His Kingdom.
No one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian affairs--he wants to please his commanding officer.
II Timothy 2:4
:] I am very happy to hear this! You're right, it's stupid to bow down to a number, as if the number dictates your self-worth. I think you're beautiful Aunt Laurial, very respectible, and look at how many people love you! And really, if you think about it, do we WANT to live by Hollywood standards? Let's see, Lindsay Lohan is coked up and wearing snagged tights, Britney went insane and lost her kids, Mary Kate Olsen's in and out of anorexic rehab (and God, does that girl dress like an eccentric 80 year old widow) and the list goes on and on. Jennifer Love Hewitt, cute, great body ... they said she was getting fat at a size 2!! It's ridiculous. The more perfect you are, the more people are waiting to bring you down. Nobody is ever happy with anyone because they aren't happy with themselves and their own insecurities. Confidence is the most attractive feature you'll ever find in a person because it is rare and the only glimpse we have into someone's genuine soul. THAT is what's beautiful ... not knobby-kneed Hollywood crack whores. :)
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post Lori!!! It reminds me of an episode of What Not to Wear on TLC. The hosts were saying that if you want to look good, just buy clothes that fit you! I'm guilty of buying clothes that I want to fit into, then I end up never being able to wear them.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!! These posts have meant a lot to me.
GREAT post! It reminds me of a visit I had recently with a mentoring friend. After 5 minutes of my venting, she nailed my Martha mentality to the wall. I heard the Lord say clearly, "Do NOT let yourself get yoked into slavery." It is for FREEDOM that Christ has set us free. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteLaurie, can you email me at learningastheygrow@yahoo.com? I just need some sound advice from an unbiased source. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Kristy